Essential 9: Develop Acceptance

When you develop the ability to identify and accept the circumstances in your life you cannot change, yet strive to make positive changes whenever and wherever you can, you will discover lasting peace and hope.

Points to Consider

• You must learn to identify what you can and cannot change in your life. Not every circumstance in your life is under your control. Learning what you can affect, and what you must accept as being out of your control is key to your emotional health
• Acceptance does not mean giving up. Accepting the circumstances in your life that are out of your control does not mean you should give up on making changes that will improve your life and health—do what you can, when you can• Accept others while encouraging growth. Accepting others, faults and all, can be challenging, but as you seek to love and accept those around you while encouraging them to make positive changes in their lives, you will
improve your emotional health while helping them become more successful
• Accept that small changes are wonderful. In our desire to change and grow, we are often full of self-doubt and self-criticism when we feel we are not progressing as quickly as we should. Be quick to recognize your accomplishments and accept your progress; it will motivate you to grow even more
• Acceptance can take time and patience. Accepting difficult life circumstances can take time—it is difficult to deal with painful situations you are powerless to change. However, you can determine your attitude and your actions. Focus on what you can do to make the circumstances less difficult for yourself and others

Substantiation

In a 62-year study, Harvard researchers tracked 814 men and women from varied backgrounds from their late adolescent years to their mid-80s. The results of the study found that maintaining healthy relationships and having a flexible attitude—happiness, in essence—was key to aging well.